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Why I Quit Being a Doctor

The more accurate title for this blog post would be why I quit being a Dr.

On Twitter, I removed the title from the name heading my profile. I’d been trying it out for a few months just because. I’d been told more than a few times to use it to establish “credibility.”

I’ve never really felt comfortable with it outside of specific settings. If you’re my patient, my student, or my colleague in a professional setting then it seemed to fit the environment. Outside of that, I NEVER introduce myself in person as such. The way I see it, if it isn’t on your birth certificate, it’s not your first name.

However, being a double minority, I was also told that it was important to use the title because I could never tell whom I was influencing.  A little black girl or younger black woman may envision what would be possible for her if she were aware of my own path.  See, female oral and maxillofacial surgeons are a serious minority.  Add black to that and the number severely diminishes. I doubt there are more than a hundred in the country.

The dilemma is that I’m very clear that what I do has little to do with who I am. Sure, you may be able to guess a few things about my character, but my profession doesn’t tell you anything about my heart.

On social media, I talk about personal development and spirituality and all things related. Like my personal relationships, it’s where I’m most myself. Just Emelia.

If people want to know a little bit more about my background, they can get that on my website, or any bio associated with my social media profiles and the articles that I write.

Being a doctor is an integral part of my story and how it unfolds, but it’s not the central thing. I’m an observer. I’m a writer. I’m concerned about people’s health, but I’m far more concerned with their spirits.

That’s what I want my conversations to lead with.

What do you think?

  • Andy Phillips September 30, 2012, 3:53 pm

    What an interesting dilemma. I’m English and using titles for yourself is generally frowned upon but the issue of being a role model for others is an interesting challenge. I think I agree that it would dominate your overall brand though but having Dr in front of your name may add credibility. Or it may obscure your other interests/skills. Tricky one! Andy

    • emelia October 4, 2012, 3:53 pm

      Thanks for leaving your comment, Andy. It’s something I struggle with almost daily…figuring out where’s it’s relevant and where it’s not. I think it’s most uncomfortable when someone I feel I know calls me Doc. It feels as if they are trying to play to the ego side of me. It’s an interesting challenge.

  • MELISASource October 6, 2012, 3:54 am

    Wow Emelia I can certainly relate to this! that was one of the reasons why it was important to me not to have and words associated with “Mom” in my social media name and the name of my blog. I’ve been a Mother for so long that I wanted to have a place and space where I can be separate from that and just be me. So I truly understand where you’re coming from on this! Thanks so much for sharing! 🙂

    • emelia October 7, 2012, 3:26 pm

      Exactly! Of course you take pride in your accomplishment, but you are more than the title. Thank you for your honesty. Many women feel that by saying they are more than “just a mother” minimizes the importance. What you are saying is there are other beautiful facets to you and you are celebrating them all. Good for you.

  • Chris PM November 14, 2012, 4:23 am

    …Just popping over from Positively Positive. Your down-to-earth approach is really a welcome one! As someone who has spent a lot of time as a patient this past year (traumatic injuries) it is always great to know we can connect with those who “treat” us. After my accident I had (and continue to have) difficulty not being able to get back into my career as expected…that was how I had identified myself. One of the blessings in slowing down has been that I notice SO much more of the world around me. Interesting how that works!

    I have two cleft-affected children, and recently was able to reflect on how I share a common bond w/ my daughter…through learning to embrace our scars.

    http://acrazykindoffaith.blogspot.com/2012/11/blessingsbehind-scars.html

    • emelia November 14, 2012, 10:58 pm

      Hey Chris!

      I just checked out your site. Your post was spot on. Isn’t it interesting that your experience now takes you to a deeper level of relationship with your children. The Universe always knows how to tie things together. It may not always come in the prettiest wrapping (your trauma), but there’s always a gift if we’re aware enough to receive it. 🙂

  • David M. Dye November 27, 2012, 4:55 pm

    Dr. Sam,

    Wow – this is powerful. I generally use the honorific when addressing anyone I know to have earned it…until they ask me not to. I know some people can be picky about it. To me, the most powerful thing you call out in this post is that our identity is not what we do. I know I’m constantly in need fo that reminder.

    Thank you!

    David

    • emelia August 28, 2013, 8:40 am

      David!!!! This is such a late response to your comment. I missed it somehow… Appreciate you seeing to the core of it all. Titles are just titles. They describe but don’t define. Thanks for dropping by.

  • deepak August 9, 2013, 4:51 am

    To live an authentic life does require reflection and being a double minority in a niche more so. Being connected to who you really are in a world awash with status..money..requires awareness. Yet the inner call upon you to be a role model..to inspire..encourage…I imagine must be difficult to reconcile. I do wish you well Emelia…and Dr.Emelia as well 😉

  • emelia August 28, 2013, 8:42 am

    Ha! Thanks, Deepak. It’s a balancing act, but one that I’m definitely grateful for even when I’m confused by it. 🙂